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IOM Blog

October 7, 2021

Three Life Lessons a King and His Court Can Teach Us

Once upon a time, there was a king who struggled with his court.  Granted, they just came off a grueling dual with a neighboring kingdom, yet they relentlessly complained of an absence of team identity, lack of participation, poor decisions, and emotions running amok.  Along with having lost a portion of their kingdom, they had lost their creativity.

The king knew he had to act fast, or the kingdom would be left without direction, in a wait-and-see holding pattern, leaving him with an apathetic, stressed-out, and sub-par court.

In his search for answers, he discovered three common denominators that he believed would give them a shared sense of commitment so they could, again, rally together on common causes, leading to a more shared vision of the kingdom. And the king knew that creating healthy habits from the first two steps were the gateway to succeeding with the third and final step.

Recognize Small Gifts in Disguise.
Times of strife can be looked at as a gift. When you and your royal court push one another to continually ask if there’s a better approach, that creative friction can lead to better solutions.  Put simply, we have to learn to disagree more.  Be curious about different points of view without taking things personally.

Stay on Track.
When you have an already volatile work environment, conversations can be derailed with defensiveness, blaming, contempt, and refusal to communicate. When this happens, the initial conversation gets lost or overrun by emotions. For instance, one person wants to express himself and feel heard while the other person dismisses him and simply stops listening and is void of any emotion.  Instead, create opportunities to appreciate each other’s strengths; make criticizing a big fat no-no; own up when you make mistakes, and let the other person know you need to step away if feeling overwhelmed.

Align Core Values.
Once they were on track with treating each other with more kindness, the king enlivened his court with the notion of how to honor their identified values. Core values are a moral compass that influence our fundamental beliefs and fuel the thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that help us realize happiness and achieve goals. Mind you, not all values will be met with equal perspectives.  Adventure, for instance, will mean something entirely different to someone else.  Instead of highlighting these differences, take the time to see where they overlap.  A court jester may value spontaneity and creative flair, whereas the duke values order, yet they both honor loyalty to their Kingdom.

Upon seeing his court in tip top shape, the King called for a buffet to celebrate and during the ceremony he stood, raised his goblet in the air and exclaimed, “Hazaa!”

Avatar photo
Michelle Lefebvre, M.A.C., CPC
Chief Executive Officer
Coach With Michelle

Michelle is the CEO of Coach With Michelle, Inc. a company that encourages and helps people Live Bigger, Bolder and Braver as leaders in their life – leaving them to love Monday mornings again.

Michelle bases her work on the notion that everyone has the ability to lead themselves and others regardless of job title and level. She is a leadership trainer, business coach, consultant and speaker. Michelle is a certified coach and mediator and has 30 years of experience working in the fields of gerontology, Human Services and teaching college. She’s been recognized with awards and has spoken at the White House alongside First Lady, Hillary Rodham Clinton and former United States Secretary of Health & Human Services, Donna Shalala.

Adding an element of fun is important for Michelle whether at work or giving back to her community. She is a former Peace Corps volunteer and enjoys running international marathons to raise awareness and funds for the eradication of Polio.

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